Saying goodbye to an old friend

Once again I take on the challenge of eating healthier, not to extend my life, but to feed my body the proper fuel that will make it not complain so much at my advancing years. I have discovered (make that rediscovered) to my horror that eating copious quantities of raw vegetables gives me terrible acid reflux, and no I won't "get used to it". The 3 tiny men trying to knife their way out through my ribcage this morning are impossible to get used to and I don't wait to revisit the period of my early life when I was on constant antacids. Cooking is the answer. Eat many vegetables, but cook them all quite soundly. Red swiss chard cooked for supper, with some nice bland potato perogies. Not all better, but down to one tiny knife-wielder and him only intermittently.
I have found since my D. became a flexitarian (mainly ovo-lacto vegetarian, but not militant about it) and we began eating many more vegetables that my taste buds and the appetite centre in my brain actually yearn for the green stuff. What a relief that eating more vegetables is not a chore for me; I don't even crave any of the old baddies that I used to require to feel satisfied about food. Except chicken fingers and chicken nuggets: wild midnight cravings for those still pounce on me and bother me for weeks if I deny them, and then I feel flushed with pleasure when I finally do break down and eat them.
Another aspect of trying to create a health body to carry me through a couple more decades on this Earth is the activity. Several friends have taken up jogging/running, and their tales of success have inspired me. Not to run, I'm actually anti-running for myself, but fast walking with my dog. I think that both she and I could stand to lose a little mass in order to produce healthier bodies with which to ride out this next little bit of the millennium.
One thing that bothers me about eating well and moving around more, is the possibility of losing weight, or bulk, heft, substance, mass. I am reluctant to give up some of my bulk. I wear it as a protective layer against the vicissitudes of the natural (read "human") world. While less agile with this bulk, I am warmer, better padded against knocks, and I have more landing space for falls, more weight to throw around or use as a defence; I am more easily spotted by speeding cars, less easily missed by passing waiters. When I was thin (yes, 20 years ago), I felt like a wraith, a nothing, barely recognized as existing by most people. Easily pushed over, quickly passed by, nothing to worry about, a puff of smoke in a crowded dance hall.
I have earned this bulk, this substance, this sign of my successful pursuit of gain, the proof of my opulent and decadent lifestyle, and I cringe to separate my psyche from my physical proof; I also have become friends with the mass of me that I have nurtured for 15 years, and I may need counselling to get over its loss. If I lose any of it. Last fall, I lost 3 pounds with barely trying, but then I put it back on with only a little bit of effort. We'll see if the walking and eating better result in less of me; I'll get used to the new me, just like I got used to the larger me. I'm sure there are some socio-political benefits to being a little slimmer than my current heft; I'll just have to figure them out as I go along. My D. says I could replace one type of bulk with better muscle strength, but let's just start with the walking program and see how that goes.

Pie vacation

Butterscotch with meringue, peach, blueberry, apple, lemon meringue, and chocolate pies, apple crisp, peanut butter chocolate chip cookies: just some of the desserts available during our five days in Nova Scotia. My parents picked us up at the airport, and we stopped in Grand Pre on the return drive (2 hrs just to get to my parents' place from the airport!). We ate supper at the Evangeline Inn in Grand Pre: best pie in the universe. I had hyped the pie pretty hard prior to our trip, and I'm sure my D. was sceptical because he is such a sweets aficionado. The chalkboard list of freshly made pies was a good sign; one caught his eye especially: "butterscotch pie? I've never heard of that before!" It was divine, with lighter than air meringue on top of the best butterscotch pudding I've ever tasted. Well, I only got to taste this one a little bit, because it was his pie; actually one of his two pieces of pie. He enjoyed them both so much (the other was apple) that I had to run up to the cash and pay the bill before he could order a third piece. I was glad that place in Grand Pre lived up to the hype: NS really is the land of pie.
We had a nice visit with my parents, and even got to eat lunch out with my 88-year-old grandmother. She adores the local Chinese food buffet, where they have mussels. My grandmother ate very well and had an extra plate of mussels for dessert!

We had one day (Thursday) of mild and sunny and dry weather that my D. and I took to visit an amazing beach where I always feel refreshed right down to my soul after a trip there: Risser's Beach on the South Shore. We were so lucky to get a day like Thursday: warm as summer and yet very few people because it was a weekday in Sept. The soft pale sand massages and buffs your feet (yes, it was warm enough right there on the Atlantic Ocean for bare feet that day), and the salt breeze cleans out your brain; we walked and tossed stones into the surf and collected sand dollars and sat near the dunes for a minute, not thinking about anything except how good the sun felt on our faces. That's relaxation! There's a campground; maybe some year we'll just stay there at Risser's for our whole vacation week. People can come visit us there for an afternoon: we'll BBQ.
My grandmother of the double-mussels had left a box of her journals with my parents when she moved into a small apartment at an assisted living place in Berwick. My mom remembered the box while we were visiting, so I had a chance to look at the journals for a minute. Grandma had labelled the box: "For Jackie L., to read/to toss." That is so her! The writings chronicle about 30 years of my grandmother's life out on the dairy farm in the Annapolis Valley; I was fascinated, so I wrapped up the box and mailed it to myself. I think I might work on transcribing some of the tidbits for my cousins in the future, when they might be nostalgic for some little extra bits of grandma's life. I hope they arrive in one piece.
On the Tuesday evening, we went to see my father play his banjo at a local bluegrass/country jam, and I was inspired. He seems to really enjoy that socializing aspect of his new interest in banjo-playing. All I could think about the whole time was when would I get to karaoke out with my friends again? All those jammers looked like they were having such fun! One guy did a song I sort of knew, so I sang along a bit in the crowd with other people, but it's not the same as the 'raoke.
Glad we went, but glad to be back: travelling, especially by plane, wears me out. Thank goodness for this new product called "earplanes" which keep the change in pressure from torturing my ears. I used to have so much pain that I would dread flying, but these things truly work: no pain there or back in the middle of ragweed season, and I don't have to take those heavy decongestants either. What a relief: I highly recommend this product. You can get earplanes at Shopper's Drug Mart for $7.49, and I think they last for two return-trips. If you have ever experienced the pain, you will know that is nothing to pay for the relief.
One major joy about returning to Hamilton was seeing my doggie! We were too late to get her last night, and I could barely sleep all night for thinking about her. This morning we rushed over and picked her up; she seems fine, but very tired. I think the other dogs barked so much that she didn't have much chance for her usual naps. We were so happy to see her that we bought her another stuffed toy, like she needs another one of those. She fell asleep on top of it on the sofa just now, so I think she likes it. It's called Burly Berber Bull.
I can't believe how long it has been since I blogged; that was fun, will not wait so long in between again.