A compelling blog

Back when I was thinking about writing a novel, THE novel, the one that haunted me every morning for weeks when I woke up and then followed me to work, tickling details for scenes inside my brain ... back then I was trying to work through a problem. Many writers mention that working through a problem is part of their writing process, and it actually was happening to me every time I thought about writing this particular novel. My problem? How do you get a person to do something that he or she does not want to do? How do you really compel a person? Can you MAKE anyone do something that he or she doesn't want to do? And if you can MAKE them do something, how do you write about that accomplishment in a realistic way? The reason I was thinking about this problem was that in order for the protagonist of the novel to fall into the arms/trap of the hero/villain, she would have to do things that I was certain she would never ever want to do.
Now, on tv shows and in some movies, they show wives giving their husbands the "evil eye" or some such LOOK, and he magically bends to the wife's will, doing something he did not want to do. I've never had this experience, succeeding with the compel via a simple look; my evil-eye look is defective, or I wore it out by using it too often on my brother when we were growing up, without much success then either. And, I've heard people say that some children obey their parents, even doing things the children do not want to do, just out of respect for their parental units' wishes. I'm sure I did that a few times when I was a child, but I really don't see how parents nowadays can make that happen if a child were to really dig in his or her heels in any given situation (so many methods of "persuasion" are disallowed today: no screaming at them, no spanking or whacking with a wooden spoon, no sugary treats as rewards).
Child-rearing aside, how do you compel?

I made a list.
The basics are extortion, blackmail, and force; all illegal in modern society, all ubiquitous, all unethical. But they work.
Back to my novel, none of those options would work in my story if I was going to make the reader believe that the heroine was falling in love with the rapscallion at the same time that he was (somehow) getting her to do something she didn't want to do (steal a priceless Egyptian artifact from the small regional museum where she worked, if you must know).
The rest of the list reads like this (nouns and verbs mixed together here, GrammarBros): persuasion, logic, convince, persistent demands, plead, peer pressure, reward, bribe, lie about results/benefits of the desired action, call in a favour, beg for help, lie about the reality of the situation. I've been thinking about this a lot. 
Most of those options fail in the ethical realm too, because they abrogate the person's right to freedom of choice. If a person does not want to do something, don't they have the freedom to NOT do it in our 21st-century Canadian society? Now, I'm talking more about my experience with life than my novel. [I mean, in my novel the villain/pretty-boy is actually quite unethical, so I can use all the methods from the second list throughout the course of the novel, to bend her to his will. But will she bend? And why?]
IRL, since thinking about this, I have been less and less likely to try to manipulate a person so that they will do something they do not want to do. Nothing is really that important to me that I will step all over a person's freedom of choice, the only freedom we really have anymore in this world.
Way too serious, this blog, but it's something I've been thinking about, a lot, so I let it pour out tonight; thanks for staying tuned. Any other options you can think of, to compel? Share them in the comments: t'anx.

Questions answered

I am having so much fun at karaoke; the 'roake ventures have opened up whole new levels of enjoyment in my life. Friday night's karaoke adventure also helped me answer a few questions that had been plaguing me.
(1) Do I absolutely have to drink beer when I'm out for karaoke? The answer for me is that beer is an essential lubricant for my vocal cords. I didn't drink beer to start the evening, and I froze at the beginning of my first song, Kajagoogoo's "Too Shy," with dry mouth and extreme nerves. 

I got going a bit with the chorus and lasted through the entire song, but that was tough. After switching back to beer, I didn't have dry-mouth again the whole night.
(2) Do I sing new songs, previously attempted songs that went well, or songs that I have practiced on my new Xbox 360 Karaoke Revolution game? For me, the most fun I have had at 'raoke is with songs I have practiced at home by singing along to youtube videos or learned and repeated many times on the K-Revolution game.  I rocked Pink's "So What": see below for pic of my rockin'.

Group-songs are completely different: very fun to try new-to-me songs in a group, and can have hilarious results too; as long as one person in the group swears that she knows the song (even if she really doesn't) to give the group a boost of confidence prior to getting up on stage.
(3) Do I need to be a good singer to 'roake? Again, the answer is definitely NOT. And I don't mean practicing (above) as in I suddenly become a better singer, just practicing so that I can get into the song when the music starts and the lyrics flash on the screen; it really is about getting-into the song, feeling the rock in your soul.
(4) Do I really need to be called up more than twice for solos during an evening of 'raoke? Now, it's fun when the atmosphere is stoked and the crowd is hot, and the variety in tunes chosen is amazing, and so many different people want to serenade us; but I'm selfish. Thank goodness I also got to do a duet with Lady Z at the end of the night. We had fun with The Killers "Human" [and, yes, I'm positive that this song is about zombies].

I want to sing more ... thank the games-developers, I have the 'raoke in my house now. Maybe tonight, a short session (with my D. hiding upstairs; good thing we have two tvs). Sometimes he does hang out when I use the Xbox 'raoke, and he has very helpful thoughts about the singin'. I told him I was going to buy him a 'roake shirt that reads "Karaoke Koach."
Yes, another blog entry about karaoke; I'm addicted, and, as I mentioned before, I don't need any help with that.

Kale CAN be delicious

One of the super-foods people tout lately is kale. 

Now, I like greens, greens, greens, but not everyone enjoys kale. I saw a fun way recently to get just about anyone to eat some kale: make it into chips.
If you want to try eating this mega-food in an entree, here's a delish re-ceep that has odd ingredients, but the resulting dish is divine.
Penne with Kale, serves 4
12 oz penne pasta (sorry, re-ceep is from an American magazine)
3 tsp evoo
1/4 cup pine nuts OR walnuts OR pecans
1 Tbsp minced garlic
1 and 1/2 cups broth (I use veggie broth)
1 bag or bunch of kale, stems removed and coarsely chopped [NOTE: for kale, it is important to extract as much of that hard central stem as possible, and the chopping really helps with kale-enjoyment too]
1/4 cup golden raisins (tip: if your raisins are a little dried out from languishing in the cupboard, cover them in boiling water in a bowl for at least 15 min. while you're getting everything else ready; then drain them when you're ready to start the sauteing part of this re-ceep)
garnish: shaved Parmesan cheese and red pepper flakes, which REALLY finishes this dish and you should should should include!
1. Cook pasta as package directs.
2. Meanwhile, heat 1 tsp oil in skillet over medium heat, stir in nuts, saute 1 minute or until lightly toasted, remove and reserve.
3. Heat 2 tsp oil in same skillet, add garlic, saute 30 seconds; add broth, kale, and raisins (drained! if you had to soak them). Cover and steam 5 to 6 minutes until greens are tender.
4. Drain pasta, return to pot, toss with kale mixture and nuts. Serve with Parmesan cheese and red pepper flakes.
Happy greens-eating!
After you make this and love it, then the next day you might be stuck again over what to make for dinner: the blog Smitten Kitchen inspires me all the time.
Now, I have to go figure out what to have for dinner, maybe the eggplant that's languishing in my bottom fridge drawer needs to be devoured tonight. NOM.
P.S. The eggplant made it into a quick-stew of veggies that I served on brown rice; it was definitely NOM.
One of my favourite new food blogs belongs to Lady Buttons, and she's my inspiration.

Escapism clears my mind

A rant about tv and fancy schmancy new technologies:
I watched a first-season episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer tonight on Much Music, and then a second-season episode of Angel off DVD. What pleasure, what sublimity, or, as Homer says, "C'mon TV, give me some of that sweet, sweet pap!" I need my tv shows to ooze escapism; they must lead me into the land of pure crazy fantasy where my brain cells relax completely and the story carries me away. And looking at David Boreanaz for almost an hour doesn't hurt my sense of well-being either. That's why I can rarely get into prime time soaps, or dramas that are really just soaps in disguise, because they're too realistic; the pettiness, the drama-queens, the politicking: man, I get enough of that off the news channels and in my family for about 25 years.
That's the same reason I don't go to 3D movies, even though everyone else in the world apparently saw Avatar in 3D and LOVED it. My life is 3D enough for me; I don't need that in my movies too, shoving that stuff right into my brain; hey, back off a little, I want some distance from my escapism so that I can take a relatively short trip to get back to reality when the hour's up. I want to escape for a while, not drown. And I definitely won't be buying a 3D tv; again, life = 3D, don't need that in my story-box too.
I've been learning about accessibility issues lately at work, thanks to mandatory online training modules. This 3D technology is not particularly successful for people who must use corrective devices for their vision; I heard more than one person say that the 3D glasses needed to watch the movie did not sit on their face well at all with their own glasses. What a surprise that a Hollywood gadget fails to consider accessibility issues, 'cause if the average 14-year-old boy can wear the 3D movie-glasses without problems, then why should they care about the aging population that is growing larger and larger every year? And all this neglect in a time when wearing glasses is again rather chic, at least among my crowd of peeps.
Back to the pap, I need it, I crave it, I must have it, but I won't be buying the latest tv gizmo, at least not until they make adjustments for those of us who don't want to balance their wacky glasses on top of the perfectly good glasses that we must wear to actually see the tv. I guess they need to invent prescription 3D glasses, then I'll go see Avatar.
Note: The Simpsons is one of my favourite tv shows ever, and it would NOT be better in 3D.

My teenage heart writes poems

Sometimes I write poems; I wake up with them fully formed and running circles inside my brain. They scream sappy, sentimental teenager publishing in the high school yearbook, but I can't get them out of my head until I write them down. They might sound better if I had the nerve to read them out loud because they're sort of beatnik-y in their rhythms, and they never ever rhyme, so its the mood in the voice that I hear in my head when I'm typing them.
My blog, a great place to let it all hang out, literally and literarily.


"Give me a kiss," by Alice

Give me a kiss.

Not that open-lipped, too many teeth, talking about your workday while I lean in kind of kiss.

Give me a gift

that is all of you

part of you

almost too much of you

to take.

Gift me a kiss

that takes all of your mind, your person to form.

Kiss me with your thoughts not just your lips.

Karaoke has the power to save the world

In my 2010, my year of trying new things, I have now participated in karaoke three times. I feel like a kid again when I get up at that mike, even though I can't really sing, but I try, try, try. During my second karaoke adventure, I totally rocked the Bangles, "Manic Monday."

The glory of karaoke resides in the atmosphere of support, encouragement, and conviviality that emanates from the crowd. Everyone there wants to sing their hearts out too, so we all cheer each other on, clap raucously, sing along, enjoy the shared cathartic nature of rocking out to a favourite tune.
All that good will in one room fills me with hope for humanity. The first time I went, when a friend explained the nature of the karaoke experience to me, I said, "Karaoke has the power to change the world."
This week, two friends proffered completely different reactions to my telling them about my karaoke experiences. One laughed at me a bit, groaned, and grew tired of my giddy rants about the wacky and wonderful times that karaoke outings provide; the other said "that is one of the most inspiring things I've heard for a long time" and now wants to try karaoke together the next time we meet. I have to admit that I was the sceptical one initially, hearing stories about fun and frivolity at karaoke, until I tried it; now I'm a convert, I find it inspiring, and cathartic, therapeutic even; and rockin' to a song, like "Manic Monday" fills me with a sense of achievement that bolsters my mood and confidence for days. I will fully admit that I may be a karaoke addict; as I've noted in other forums, though, I don't need any help with that. 
What a gift, to find an activity to truly enjoy again, after my 2009 was so dull that I asked a friend who studies psychology if a person could actually die of boredom. Thanks to my friends who have shared this gift with me, and I hope to continue to ENJOY this world-saving hobby that is karaoke.

None too giddy

As I sit down to write my first blog, I'm thinking about tone, about how to keep a reader interested in my random ramblings, and how when I write I tend to lose much of the giddiness that fills my brain and my conversations on a daily basis. I know I've made people laugh (with me, and of course at me, or at my antics) from time to time, and I laugh at silly things like the movie Nacho Libre or Lego Indiana Jones or lolcats pictures; but when I write, serious old Alice creeps down my arms and seeps out the ends of my fingertips onto the keys. It's with irony that I chose the blog moniker Alice from one of the silliest books ever written to sign off on these blogs that will probably rarely read as silly. I don't want to force it, the giddiness, the silliness that have been filling my days with joy this 2010, and the last half of 2009, so I will just write, to get into the habit of writing, and hope that giddy Alice will peek out once in a while. Now, onto the blogging.
One of the best decisions I made about four years ago was to try a social experiment on myself, some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) if you will. I don't have children, so I had to run this psychosocial test on myself. I found that the Canadian behaviour of saying "I'm sorry," "Sorry!" "sorry about that," "Oh, I'm so sorry" was diluting the real meaning of that word to the point where the phrase was more a verbal tick than any true indication of regret. I decided to try to reserve saying "I'm sorry" when I really meant it, when I was regretful or wanted to express a sense of loss. I say "try" because I am not always successful, of course, since hearing that tick all the time from fellow Canadians certainly makes it harder to avoid saying it. What do I say instead? "Excuse me" or "pardon me" in physically awkward situations, and other polite expressions of cordial good nature in appropriate circumstances (there's serious-Alice again). The best (and scariest) part about avoiding "sorry" is that when I removed that phrase from a situation in which I made a mistake, I had to start taking responsibility of my mistakes. I had to own the error, ("my bad" as some of the hip kids say these days); that owning was a terrifying prospect at the beginning of this experiment, or lifestyle change as the case may be. And do you know what happened when I started saying, "I made that mistake"? Nothing. Nada. Zip. Bupkis. People opened up to this statement of my human nature of erring, identified with me as a fellow flawed, vulnerable being, and I followed the owning of the error with the spoken resolution to fix the mistake or to do better next time, and everything was just fine. A revelation.
A liberating phrase, that I am so glad I found at some point in my life: "I made a mistake." Say it out loud, say it proud; I do, and it changed my life.

Choosing the name

After saying how much I enjoyed a friend's blog, she said "You should blog too."

That was about four months ago; I took that long to come up with the name of my blog. I found the name today, and was excited by it, so of course I Googled the title "Ice Cream for Breakfast," hoping, yearning for it to be somewhat original; alas, it already belongs to a book. After discussing the quandary with another friend, I decided to cleave to the name that had burst into my brain after making a smoothie for my morning meal today, the name that filled me with anticipation when I thought of assigning it to my blog. So, here it is, Alice's blog, "Ice Cream for Breakfast."

The smoothie that inspired this title was made with vanilla ice cream, peaches, frozen blueberries, milk, and one over-ripe banana. Although I've been all growed up for many many (many!) years, I still get a rush from eating what I want to whenever I want to, something I couldn't do as a child. Another favourite is that every summer, we have one big strawberry shortcake feed as the only item on the menu: dessert for supper, ah, that's nice. It's the little things.

A couple tidbits about me: I am a 40-ish professional editor who enjoys eating and Xboxing, cooking and reading, dog-walking and badminton. My parents nicknamed me Alice when I was a kid, so I thought it would work as a moniker for a blog. Mostly this blog will comprise short essays, recipes, ramblings, karaoke reports, and general giddiness. More soon.